To the Mother Who Just Had #3

Omaha Moms BlogYou’ve totally got this. Go ahead and reread that a few times. YOU ARE CAPABLE.

But, I know right now you don’t feel it. You’re feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, and frankly a bit in over your head. While the whole outside world knows you are competent of momming three little ones, you are still yet to be persuaded.

In a way, you’ve done this before. You found that your heart could indeed expand and love your second baby just as much as your first. (And the worry you had about that is legitimate!) By now you are confident in your 1:2 ratio when you’re on your own. It could be that you have a hard time even remembering what it was like when it was 1:1.

You’ve been down the road of having more than one little one on your hip, more than one small hand to hold. And while that took some adjusting, you did it. You became the mama of not just one but TWO kids and you found your balance.

But now…. now there are THREE. And low and behold you only have two hips. You only have two hands. And those hips are endlessly clung to, those hands are working overtime with diaper changing, nursing sessions, book reading, bath giving, bedtime snuggling, tear wiping and the list goes on.

Are you feeling a bit “touched out” at times?

Yeah, that’s absolutely normal. Mama, you are stretched THIN right now. This is the most needed you have ever been and will ever be. There is no break. How is it possible to still feel needed even when you are sleeping? But you still feel it. The unending demands are real. It is justified if you feel one hundred percent spent.

Not only does your body feel different physically, you’re feeling a bit not like yourself mentally. Give yourself time to adjust to this new change. You will slowly get yourself back, but it takes some patience.

Eventually you will conquer taking them all out in public. And it will feel just like that. A TRIUMPH. Celebrate that. Get used to the fact that everywhere you go you will get told you “have your hands full” because well in fact, you do have your hands full. Some convey it in a different way than others. Perfect your best smile and nod before leaving the house.

There will come a day when you no longer cling to your husband’s ankles when he tries to leave to run an errand and all three stay at home with you. After some time, you will worry a bit less about forgetting one of them somewhere and you’ll spend a little less time counting heads every time you get in the car.

At last, these three will become your crew.

Your posse. It will feel unusual and strange when you only have two with you, or even more bizarre- just one. It may feel like a tiny vacation. You’ll fall into a system and you’ll be in the Guinness book of world records for fastest carseat clicker of all time.

It will go so fast. For some reason it goes rapidly faster the third time around. There is a reason it will feel like a a blur and it is because you truly are in constant motion.

Try to stop and take in the moment, by being in the now. I’m not telling you this because I know how, I am more telling you because I need the same reminder. We all do as moms.

Now, will you do me a favor? Inhale that sweet newborn baby smell right now. Bury your face into that tiny, fuzzy head and breath baby in. Remind yourself as often as you can you were chosen to be this little bundle’s mommy, as well as the two older babes and look how far you have come!

No one else could do it better. 

Erika resides in Midtown Omaha with her husband Chris and their three kids, Macklin, Everly and Henrik. She has a background in early childhood education and child development. She enjoys long walks down target isles, eating raw cookie dough out of the fridge, attempting to craft, and embracing the chaos of motherhood.


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